Up until now, Alex and I have felt like we'd gotten some signs showing us that getting married December 18, 2010 was the perfect time. A class required for him to graduate, only scheduled in the spring and summer, was brought to his attention late last semester. The time for this spring conflicted with another class, therefore making it to where he either had to take it this summer (removing him from going to Fuge) or next spring (2011), which would mean we would have had to move the wedding to next summer after he (and I, by then) graduated. The teacher made an exception for he and Drew, because of the exceptional music education students they are, and let them take it by making it an independent study class. There were some scheduling issues late last year, another couple wanting our date, but since we booked so early (last July), we had the church first (there's no better way to say that). We've just felt for a long time that 12-18-10 was our day, and we've gotten attached to it.
However, today I just happened to look at the academic calendar for UTC next year to see when the last day of exams were. Turns out that UTC has all of a sudden changed graduations, starting after this May, to Saturdays instead of Sundays (Sundays have been the day for graduation forever). That means that Alex's graduation is now on Saturday, December 18, 2010 instead of Sunday, December 19, 2010...on our "ex"-wedding date.
After some screaming and a few tears and Alex saying "It's going to be fine" for the 734th time, I still have no idea what to do. I feel kind of silly for being so upset about this screwing everything up, but at the same time your wedding date is really important. It's most frustrating because we already booked the church for the ceremony/reception and the rehearsal, and the photographer. Thankfully, the photographer doesn't have a problem moving the day and the church won't either...it's just a matter of when we're going to move it to.
Yes, we have thought about Alex not walking at graduation. That was his first thought. But I don't think it's fair for him, and two people in our wedding party are graduating that day as well, so if we kept it the same day, we wouldn't have them at our wedding, which I don't want either. We've thought about Saturday night, but our pastor is already booked for a wedding that night, the church doesn't allow anything past 8pm, and the two people in our wedding party also graduating probably want to spend that night with their family. We've thought about Friday night. The church doesn't care how long you stay on Friday (I guess cause it gives them Saturday to put everything back where it was and prepare for church). But I'm so worried about it being a problem for people still in school or having to work that day and then driving to Chattanooga. And the rehearsal would be on a Thursday...who does that? We can't do it on Sunday because too much happens at my church on Sunday. I even thought about January 1, 2011. But I still think that's kind of weird...not sure what Alex thinks about that either. This has just absolutely messed everything up!
I know the most important thing is who I say my vows to and just being married is worth all this hassle, but it's still really frustrating. I also know that the people who care about us most will do anything they can to be at our wedding, so I shouldn't think too much about other people's opinions.
Now I'm starting to doubt that this is the time for us to get married. Should we really get married in December? Is this a sign saying, "No, don't get married in December"? Should we get married after I graduate, making most of my family happy? The only reason why we picked December was because he would be out of school. If he gets a job and has to move, he may have to move in January, so why even get married if we're just going to be apart for 5 months, 'til I'm out of school? I just do not know what to do...we're in quite a pickle.
Take a deep breath, Rebecca. Remember the title of this blog... "Living Simply." Why? Because it's easier? More fun? No, I think it's so you don't get caught up in the craziness of life and lose focus of the Big Picture and how life is really all about glorifying God with our lives. Living simply reminds us to keep our eyes fixed on Him. I know you're so disappointed about your date... holy moly, all the work you've put into your wedding already, all the things you've imagined that day would be. I'm so sorry something completely out of your control has pretty much messed that up. I'm listening to the Passion album and the song lyrics playing say, "Our present, our future, our past is in Your hands. We're covered by Your blood." Rebecca, no matter what happens, no matter what day you get married, the Lord is sovereign over that. Trust Him, that there's a reason for this seemingly horrible inconvenience, and the new date, the new plans are going to be better than you could ever imagine. He truly does have your best interest at heart. What matters, is at the end of this, regardless of the date, you'll be married to a wonderful man, and in a marriage where Christ is the center. No college graduation/wedding date fiasco is going to change that!
ReplyDeleteI'll be praying for you guys as you try to figure out what the best plans are for your wedding... and that all the things that have had to change will be easily fixed. I'm sorry you're having to go through this. Want me to make a phone call, get graduation changed? I've got your back. ;)